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A Day In The Life Of New York


Ashley, Matt and me – first time ever on a subway.

Yesterday we went to New York.  We rode the subway and had an epic time. Then it hapend….I was simply jugling knives wit a few other street performers. Then my Aunt Dawn rushed over 2 me an gave me a bit of bad news. The news was horrible, we were about to go through sucurity and i would have 2 do sumthing wit my knives. Wit this delema i came 2 the cunclution that i wud eather have 2 take my $1,000 knives and attack the security guards or i cud hide them in the bushes and hope they arnt fownd. I ponderd upon the options and decideds it was an easy desision becus i didnt want 2 get my knives bloody so i hid my knives in the bushes. Upon making my desision i realized i wud need 2 find a new mode of transportation 2 Elise Island to c the statue of liberty becus i had just thrown a pilot out of a helicoprter an the gaurds werent 2 hapy about it. As the security gaurds were cuming for me we all piled into the helicopter an i flew us of  in2 the sky wile bulets were flying at us. I decided to stop at the observation deck of  the “Statue of Liberty” becus we were out of gas an cudnt make it 2 the top. Wen it landed we all ran inside just in time 2 avoid the explotion cawsed by bullet wounds taken 2 the copter.


The Statue of Liberty

Then we all paraglided 2 the bushes i hid my knives in and i grabed them. We all took of running like a scene in “Bay Watch” so we cud get 2 the subway station. Once we got on the subway we thought we were safe but we thought wrong. The subway started 2 shake and the lights were flikering so they shut all the trains down. We all jumped off an ran down the subway tunnels to avoid the army men in tankes that were heading down the stations stairways and circling the streets above. The tunnels became pitch dark so Uncle Justin fliped out his fone an lit the way for us all while Matt led the way.Once we found a nice exit that wasnt surrounded we ran out an were all very exhausted. If I wasnt so important to the progress of the trip im sure they wud hav ditched me. Althow i new i cud always count on King Kong for help.


Uncle Justin snapped this picture of King Kong just before he jumped over to the Chrysler Building.

I noticed king kong on 1 of the streets so i franticly caled out 2 him. He came over and looked very conserned so i told him the hole story and he looked overjoyed 2 be able 2 help us. What we hadnt noticed b4 king Kong pointed it out 2 us was that we were siting in the middle of time square. He then took off runing and jumped up 2 the top of the crysler building, y didnt he climb up 2 the top of the empier state building i dont know but it mite hav ben 2 distract all the security.


Matt, Ashley and me in Times Square.  King Kong pointed out that this is the first time in history that New York City has closed Timesquare to automobile traffic.


Me enjoying a picnic lunch at the lake in Central Park.  Across the lake you can see the tops of the buildings on New York’s upper west side.

While King Kong was distracting the security gaurds and the army we all enjoyed a nice relaxing pick-nick in central park that Aunt Dawn had packed 4 us 2 eat. It realy had built up our energy so we decided 2 continue on our treck acros New York. We decided 2 hide out in a theater. We thought we would be safe from the outside world in the theater but we wernt. As soon as we began 2 watch the play a newd man came on stage, at first we thought it was Matt then realized it wasnt. Once we got out of tharopy we all swam acros the Hudson River into New Jersy ware once again we were safe.

Which brings me 2 2day. We sleep in so we could have time to recover. After braking all those laws we decided we shud visit some lawful places to make up for it. Our first stop was the Liberty bell. Matt tried streaking so he got to be in all the major news papers like the philidelfia inquirer. He was very proud so we drove around phily and found a place 2 celebrate called “The Dinning Car” we got scraple there. It was like nothing we had ever tried b4(delisious).


Me, Ashley and Matt with the owner of the Dining Car restaurant in Philadelphia.  This restaurant was featured on Triple D on the Food Network Channel.  We tried Scrapple here.

Then i decided that sence they all stuck wit me through thik an thin that we should all go 2 the hersheys chocolate  workshop wich unfortunatly ends my story for 2day wit me sleeping on the dirty streets.         ~JORDEN~

3 Responses to “A Day In The Life Of New York”

  1. Gram says:

    Well…in spite of having to read this 3 or 4 times because I don’t have an english to texting translating guide either, I truly enjoyed all of your adventures in NYC.

    I was especially pleased to see that you snapped a picture of King Kong before he jumped over to the Chrysler Building. For a moment, while reading, I was doubting the King Kong part…but now I’m a believer!

    I’d love for you to take me in a chopper ride when you get home, but please…no crashing or emergency landings. I’d like a nice, leisurely boring ride over Ludington and Manistee please.

    Have fun, enjoy…and keep those blogs coming. Love, ~~Gram

  2. sharry says:

    Jorden Jorden Jorden, I knew you should have stayed home in Scottville. You know your aunt and uncle aren’t as young as they think they are, go easy on them ok?! 🙂 I really enjoyed your adventures, though I wish it had been written in english as I don’t yet have an”english to texting” translating guide. 🙂 I hope you don’t have too much trouble in Gettysburg…but then again it will be you, Matt and lots of cannons, yikes! Have a great day, Love Ya, Mom.

  3. Megan says:

    Everything about this story rings true except the newd man on stage. That I just don’t believe. Not in New York.

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